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  • Thinking things through -...

Thinking things through - maybe tattoo removal is for me, I'll give it some time

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  • Nurturing1
  • Created: February 5, 2019

Hi everyone, I felt the need to write down a plan for myself so I can move on with the next few months of my life. I got my tattoo a little over 3 weeks now and I'm regretting the placement, and not sure what to do about it. Right now I just don't feel like myself at all. With my other tattoos, they felt so natural and I never questioned them afterwards. With this newest one, despite the design being pretty and high quality, I'm feeling quite devasted and disconnected from my body. Anyways, I've already wasted far too much time sitting in anxiety and regret and I'm falling behind on my work so I need to just write out a plan and move on for now.-Get off social media/phone for a while. It's such a waste of my time and right now I keep looking at other people's tattoos/comparing/living in denial. I would like to redirect that time to spending more time with the people I love, and volunteering.-In 6 months - around August/September - I am going to reevaluate how I feel about it. If at that time, I have grown to like it then hurray! If not, then I will start looking into tattoo removal at that time. I might go see 2 places before hand if I feel the need to research.-If I decide that tattoo removal is the right decision, then I would like to start treatments in October of this year and plan for 2-3 years of treatments. My tattoo is a bit big, and its black and grey, so I suspect it would take 10 sessions or so.-I plan to apply for grad school next year so if I do go forward with the tattoo removal, I would hope that I am graduating around the same time my tattoo is fully removed. That makes me feel rather peaceful.The way I am choosing to look at it is that tattoo removal IS an option and if I do go with it, then timing it with my grad studies feels right. I will be 33 or 34 when I'm done school. Until then, I can live with my tattoo and my decision for a while.These past few weeks have also just sparked a desire in me to start living my life more and making choices that allow for that. I am a workoholic and for years I've been thinking about going back to school and changing careers to something that allows for a better work/life balance, but never could commit. This tattoo has motivated me to go back to school, and for that I am grateful. I also feel motivated to treat my body and mind with respect and care. I've always been fairly healthy but never truly embraced it. I'd like to improve my posture through more yoga and get rid of my anxieties through mindfulness. Anyways, not sure if anyone will read this and it feels more like a personal journal but I like that I can share my feelings with this community. If anyone is going through a similar situation, reach out in the comments.

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