Argh, I spent an hour crafting this message and then lost everything when I want to take a picture.I was diagnosed with IDC on April 24, 2015 good news, very early only 1 cm and even better news it is ER and PR positive and he HER2 negative! BRAC results pending (early diagnosis of ovarian in GMother and melanoma in GFather)A breast MRI also showed a lot of activity on the right breast. However that MRI was done the week before my menstrual cycle which apparently is a really bad time to do a breast MRI. Who knew? Obviously not the imaging center. My surgeon got approval to do another MRI at their imaging center but it still found activity on the right side not as much but showing atypical cells, both FEA and ALH recommending exsional biopsy while addressing tumor on leftI found out that a lumpectomy followed by radiation will probably result in a reduction of about 10% of the mass of the breast (not large to begin with) and will change the texture. Also the risk of potholes, divits, puckering, etc. I recently learned that reconstructive surgery is not recommended for breasts that have been radiated so if this does happen, I would have very few options for correcting itEach doctor that I speak to has their own preference and biase based on their specializationI don't think that I'm afraid of the cancer returning because I haven't freaked out about this yet, but then again I've also been spending the entire month intellectualizing everything I could about breast cancer and haven't really thought about what this means to me as a person. But I am afraid that getting up every morning and seeing a deformed breast will be extremely detrimental to my psyche, especially nine that I could've done something differently and I would have to look like this.So my dilemma do I do a lumpectomy and radiation save my healthy breast tissue, and hope for the best? Or do I do a mastectomy with reconstruction? Honestly I wouldn't mind fuller breasts, but if this had not happened I don't think it's something I would've done on my own. and of course the question is compounded if I do decide to do the mastectomy, do I do a prophylactic mastectomy on the right? I know that with the atypic I have a 20% chance getting cancer, I've already gotten cancer once, to I want to do this again? Luckily that decision does not actually have to be made at this moment because I can decide later to go ahead and do that, so I'm not burning any bridges by not doing it nowi'm afraid that I am making a very drastic decision based on what feels like very vain reasons. I would love to hear from others who have gone through the same decision making process and what your thoughts were what you did and how you feel about what you've done. I have plenty of friends with plenty of opinions, I know they all mean well but I don't think they really know what it's like to have to make this decision.Thank you in advance for anyone who's willing to share your story with me and help me to make this decision. I'm also going to a support group next week and hopefully I can get some more information directly